While
we all love giving and getting gifts, let’s also bring back the true spirit of
Christmas by reinventing the way we celebrate it, writes MARGUERITE
THEOPHIL
Many
of us are disturbed at how the meaning of Christmas gets swamped or distorted by
the sheer extent of consumerism around the season. One response is to
drastically cut out the gift-giving and entertaining that can become
unnecessarily stressful, leaving people grouchy and unfriendly.
But
wait! We like giving and receiving gifts, we like the get-togethers, we like
telling and listening to the religious story renewed with each hearing. It’s
only the way we have let it all turn into a manic, meaningless chore that people
don’t like and want to change.
I
find it interesting that so many individuals are finding creative ways to
‘recover’ the spirit of caring and sharing that is the hallmark of the Holy
Season. Asking around, I have learnt many things that we now incorporate into
our own celebrations — the main one being celebrating Saint Nicholas, and his
inspiring story of compassion and community on December 6, rather than the
morphed Santa Claus figure we have turned him into.
Aiden
Enns, one of the founders of the ‘Buy Nothing Christmas’, believes that we
should give loved ones something more meaningful than commodities like power
drills, smartphones, video games and the like. In Canada and the US, this
movement is encouraging everyone to reinvent the way we celebrate Christmas.
Enns and his wife make it a point to now give home-made presents as well as
their time, to near
and dear ones.
I
don’t think it is so much about not buying any expensive or high-tech stuff, but
rather a de-linking of this kind of giving with the festival. It is putting the
focus on the kind of giving that conveys the deeper values that this season is
meant to uphold. As the supporters of this movement tell us, the point is to get
people thinking. And one thing we have to think through is that while giving is
wonderful, buying alone is not the solution.
Yes
it’s true, shifting to this mode will meet with strong resistance in many
families. And believe me — even those parents who grumble about all the
crassness and commercialisation will beg off, saying it takes too much time,
saying the children will sulk or be upset. But the thing is to be honest with
ourselves. Truly, what do we want? What do we want to teach our
children?
Some
of us some years ago eased into the change, by requiring everyone to make
something, anything as a St Nicholas Day gift. The ‘commercial’ gifts were there
too, but a price-limit was agreed on, and half the total money usually spent was
given to a charity the whole family agreed on. Some of us do a recycled
gift-giving. I’m sure many do it anyway, but here it is an upfront deal, an
actual requirement! We agree to find things we’ve either used, but that are in
a good condition to share, or something we bought
or were gifted but probably never ever used.
So
many individuals are finding creative ways to ‘recover’ the spirit of caring and
sharing, the hallmark of the Holy Season. Some invite students or people away
from their homes to join in their celebrations. Some spend it with old people
who are alone. There are hundreds of ways to keep alive the tradition of
giving
There’s
also something called the ‘Advent Conspiracy’. This started in 2006, when five
pastors were commiserating about how Christmas now seemed only a bit about
Christ’s birth and a huge part of it was presents and parties; some members of
the congregations even went into unnecessary credit-card debt. They felt the
falsity of proclaiming and celebrating the humble birth while they and their
congregations participated in the excesses of consumerism. “We didn’t know what
to expect, but knew we had to reclaim the story of Christmas, the foundational
narrative of the Church,” they wrote in their 2009 book, Advent Conspiracy: Can
Christmas Still Change the World?
Together
they wondered how a better Christmas practice for their own communities might
look. They felt it should be a movement designed to help us all slow down
and experience a Christmas worth remembering. But doing
this meant doing things somewhat differently. Today, Advent Conspiracy is a
global movement of people and churches choosing a more meaningful Christmas
through committing to four key principles: Worshipping fully, spending less,
giving more, loving all.
Families
are creating or adapting their own special traditions too. Some invite students
or people away from their homes to join in their celebrations, some go over and
spend it with old people who are alone. There are actually hundreds of ways to
keep alive the tradition of giving.
I
heard of a family in which the parents couldn’t afford expensive gifts, but
started a ‘new tradition’ in which their five children were gifted new pajamas
on Christmas Eve that they wore to bed that night, in which to ‘wait for Santa’.
The children now have kids of their own, but they all continue this pajama
tradition.
On
the first Sunday of Advent, the children in another family receive a small empty
wooden ‘manger’ that resembles the ‘bed’ in which it is believed the Christ
child was placed when he was born, and a bundle of coloured wool cut into
lengths. Every night at bedtime, each one recalls the kind deeds performed by
them in honour of Baby Jesus for his ‘birthday surprise’. For each deed, a soft
strand of wool is added to the cradle, and the children want to make as soft and
comfortable a bed for the Holy Child as they possibly can. On Christmas, the
figurine of the Christ-child is laid on this bed made up of caring and sharing
actions.
All
these actions and rituals show us how important it is to understand through each
symbolic action that this is more about presence, manifest in many different
ways, which is infinitely more precious and more meaningful than only material
presents.
